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More gratitude

My sister shared this with me yesterday (thanks, Cathy!); I was touched by it and thought you might be, too. My gratitude to Ben Rector for this heartwarming song.

Happy day-after-Thanksgiving!

Lyrics:
Familiar highways
Lined with leaves turned brown
Making my way
Back into my hometown

Funny how this all looks different, but it feels the same
Like how life never stops changing but some things never change

So fill your plate and fill your drink
And fill this house with family
The kind of love that all these years can’t wash away
Cause the older that I get I see that life is short and bittersweet
Thank God that it’s Thanksgiving Day

Watching football
Watching families grow
The old kid’s table all have kids of their own
Starting to see my grandfather in my nephew’s eyes
Mom still can’t talk about him and not almost cry

So fill your plate and fill your drink
And fill this house with family
The kind of love a thousand miles can’t wash away
Cause the older that I get I see that life is short and bittersweet
Thank God that it’s Thanksgiving Day

So fill your plate and fill your drink
Put your dishes in the kitchen sink
And let the leftover year just wash away
Cause we made it through I do believe the longest year in history
Thank God that it’s Thanksgiving Day

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So much to be grateful for

Despite current challenges and physical distancing, it’s been a full, eventful, and deeply satisfying Thanksgiving.

I truly have so much to be grateful for!

But instead of writing a long list I’ll just sit here at the end of the day and feel the gratitude in my heart… Mmmm…such a yummy, warm and fuzzy glow!

And for some additional Thanksgiving smiles… I was looking for a video of this song but had forgotten about this recording we made a few years ago when David was down for a visit. It’s completely spontaneous (as you’ll hear) but we had a lot of fun and I think the song comes through pretty well. Enjoy…and HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Bhagavati, Ramesha, David, Jeanniei during a weekly music meeting in 2018

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For book lovers only

I’ve got one to add to the list!

“Remember a favorite book from elementary school and fantasize about being able to go back to the (now demolished) library where you can still remember the approximate area where it was shelved, in order to check it out yet again.”

True story! I must have been in sixth grade when I read that book and I still remember how much I loved it and how much I laughed while reading it. If I could remember the title (or the author) I would search for it on Google so I could read it again!

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The power of flowers

This is what my friend wrote in her Facebook post:

“Running errands this morning after picking up this lovely bouquet from the florist….! It made everyone smile! From the solemn banker to the lady in the fruit store to the check out clerk, everyone wanted to have a look & see the pretty flowers! I think I will do this more! Just walk around town with a big bouquet of flowers to see everyone smile! :)”

I told my friend I thought it was an excellent idea! And if I lived in town — where I could easily go to the florist and where it’s natural to run around doing errands — I would do it myself.

And just think, after spreading joy by carrying the flowers around for a while, you would get to increase the joy by either enjoying them at home or by gifting them to someone else! Definitely a win-win-win sort of deal.

I think this is the sort of thing Swami Kriyananda would have loved. 💐

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Answering the “tired” question

Yikes! Why am I so tired?!?

Well, it’s true that the weekend wasn’t exactly restful. It’s also true that — true to form — the more overwhelmed I feel, the more energy it takes to get anything done at all. Plus the resulting unsettledness contributes — yet again — to staying up later and later into the wee hours.

The good news is that I was finally able to get my eyes examined and new glasses ordered. I was already at least a year overdue for it when the pandemic hit, forcing me to wait even longer. Definitely feeling relieved to have a clean bill of eye health and to be replacing glasses that were starting — literally! — to fall apart.

On the other hand, nowadays a trip to town is exhausting in and of itself.

Okay! Well, I guess that pretty much answers my opening question.

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Yet more SF memories are reawakened…

…reminding me that — despite it being a major city — natural beauty was all around and readily accessible. And boy did I depend on it!

Lake Merced and Harding Park Golf Course were within easy walking distance of my apartment in Parkmerced, though I didn’t make it all the way around the lake every day (seeing as how it’s a distance of close to five miles)!

Lake Merced © Isabell Schulz/Wikipedia
Another view of Lake Merced
Harding Park golf course © Anayst/Wikipedia

Parkmerced itself was an oasis of greenery in the midst of the city.

Parkmerced Common © J. Ash Bowie/Wikipedia

Then there was Golden Gate Park and Lincoln Park and Stern Grove and so many more! In fact, I just learned that San Francisco is the first city in the U.S. to have a park within a 10-Minute Walk of every resident. I can believe it!

Golden Gate Park © Superchilum/Wikipedia
Path in Lincoln Park © Wikwill/Wikipedia
Sigmund Stern Grove



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Joyfully active in San Francisco

Sutro Bath ruins
Sutro Park
The Cliff House from Sutro Park
Golden Gate Bridge with boat

Yesterday’s blog post brought back to me just how much I loved living in San Francisco…right up until the moment when I was completely done with San Francisco, that is (a story for another time, perhaps).

The twenty-odd years that I lived there encompassed some truly magical moments. Here’s another bit from the journal notes I found:

“It’s also rather shocking to realize that this was a major way that I took care of myself. I made time for me. I got out in the fresh air and walked all over and had time to think and reflect and just be. I would go out to the ocean and feel so nurtured by the waves and the surf and the sun. I had some powerful and transcendent moments walking in storms and feeling the elemental power flowing through me. It’s not something I can put into words but I remember that feeling and I remember how open and receptive I was.”

Ah, yes. San Francisco was a great city for walking. I walked through rainstorms and fog and bright sunny days; I routinely walked the length of Golden Gate Park to get to Ocean Beach; I would walk from the Inner Sunset to Lake St in the Richmond District for Quaker meetings; once a group of us walked from Park Merced up over Portola Dr, down Laguna Honda Blvd, over to 19th Ave and back to Parkmerced. Why? Because it was a nice day for a walk!

Probably my all time favorite walking destination in the City was the area around Land’s End, including the Cliff House, Sutro Bath ruins, and Sutro Park (the photos above show just how beautiful it was, and still is, I’m sure). Of course, there was also the bridge in the distance with boats coming and going underneath (have I mentioned how much I love boats?).

It truly was my own little slice of heaven.

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Being active

I ran across some journaling notes, written about six years ago, evidently in a period of frustration at my lack of activity. I don’t recall the exact moment or what exactly I was feeling when making this list, but it certainly packs a wallop for me as I read it now. Especially considering the title I gave it:

ACTIVITIES I LOVED

tether ball
monkey bars
archery
basketball
gymnastics
track
dancing
cheerleading
hiking
rebounding
aerobics
weight training
bicycling
swimming
skipping
yoga
150 sit-ups a day
running on the beach
walking, walking, walking

It wasn’t that I “loved” exercise; I didn’t even call it “exercise” — it was just having fun doing things…

Like…
Challenging big, intimidating Tony to a tetherball showdown in 6th grade.
Organizing my high school buddies to hike up into the foothills above Milpitas for a cookout.
Riding my bicycle all over Sunnyvale (where I lived), to classes at DeAnza College, and (just once!) all the way to my boyfriend’s house in Los Altos.
Spending two hours every day in the gym: aerobics; weight training; treadmill; loving to sweat!

It was just doing fun active things with my friends. Dancing at clubs til all hours of the night. Cranking up my stereo and dancing in my living room to Al Jarreau, Gino Vannelli, George Benson, Earth Wind & Fire. I felt GOOD in my body and enjoyed using it. Of course, I never ever thought I looked good enough, but — hey! — at least I felt strong and powerful and capable.

Things started to shift when I got “serious” about finishing my degree and becoming a flutist — spending hours in class, in the library, in the practice room, in rehearsals, in carpools traveling to gigs. Getting busier and busier, more and more out of balance, more and more stressed.

Eventually I started feeling the pressure to “exercise” in order to lose the weight that was creeping on. What did I know about metabolic syndrome and stress hormones and circadian rhythms and lack of sleep leading to weight gain, etc etc.?!? Bit by bit the fun and spontaneity went away and moving my body became a chore, a “should.” Yuck.

Sigh.

It’s hard to look back and realize that I pretty much had it all, but squandered it, largely due to ignorance and iffy self-esteem (all part of my karma, of course).

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Warp speed

AKA that feeling you get when everything is suddenly all happening at once (or at least it feels that way)!

It’s tempting to just keep working in order to feel like I’m getting a handle on it all, but I know that’s not a good idea. For one thing, I’m bound to start making mistakes. And for another thing, I’m trying to get away from that kind of imbalanced behavior.

So, I’m going to stop. Even though there are still a ton of things yet undone on my list. And I’m going to breathe and then go watch a show.

It’ll all be there waiting for me tomorrow.