My deepest why for practicing

In the courtyard of the Ananda Palo Alto community, back in the day.

I’ve been receiving an increasing number of out-of-the-blue comments from people hoping to hear me play flute more often.

I’m also getting a lot of encouraging feedback about my recent, more regular practice sessions.

Then — to top it all off — I just “happened” to stumble on an old blog post from August 2019, in which I shared something I wrote way back in the early 2000’s, when I was new to Ananda:

“What I want more than anything is to be able to simply be the vehicle for music to course through. I want to be the pipeline and the music the water. And I want to be a wide-open, pure, smooth, silvery pipeline for the sacred water to flow through, not a rusty, corroded, constricted, obstructed pipeline that blocks the flow.”

I can still remember that the inspiration behind writing those thoughts was to more deeply understand (and communicate to others) WHY we need to practice and improve and aspire toward perfection.

Not to impress or to compete or to gratify our ego. But to be an ever more pure channel (or vehicle) for the Divine Flow and, through our ever-deepening attunement, to eventually merge into oneness with that flow of the Divine.

Progress report

So…I got up a full hour and half earlier than what had become my new usual.

And I haven’t missed a day of playing the flute in a few weeks now.

There are other areas where I’m still falling down rather badly, but HEY! in this moment I’m feeling rather good about myself.

Up with the sun

It’s time to give it another go…

My nights have gradually been getting later, which means my mornings have been getting later as well.

Important habits are falling by the wayside as a result, making this a trend that can’t continue. So, tonight I’m determined both to keep this short and to not get sucked in when I post the link to Facebook.

Let’s see how I do!

This time last year

I’m going back and reading some of my blog posts from a year ago. It’s the only way I can really tune back in to what life was like in the lead up to my stem cell transplant.

We had been in Sacramento for a few days at this point. The tunneled catheter was in my chest and we were preparing to have my stem cells collected the next day.

Hard to believe what a different reality that was compared to now. As I reflect on it, I think a part of me is in a sort of “reactionary” mode — experiencing lots of resistance to discipline, consistency, focus.

Maybe that’s why I’m so into upgrading my garden at the moment. Creating wine barrel planters is a way to channel my energy into something productive, but that’s also a treat.

Singing about joy with joy

There was lots of joy in the Temple of Light this morning as we sang “There’s Joy in the Heavens.”

I was particularly gratified to hear (and feel) how “tight” the ensemble is sounding. My favorite thing is being able to completely relax and simply enjoy singing with the group…and that most definitely happened today.

A real change of pace

Today was about new sights and new experiences.

Our community takes preparing for wildfires very seriously and one of our members had organized a practice drive of an alternate evacuation route. So six cars of devotees joined her for that adventure this morning.

On the one hand, I was enjoying seeing some beautiful new countryside, while on the other hand I was praying that we never have to make that drive in an emergency. Almost all of it was narrow and winding, with steep uphills and downhills, and much of it was unpaved. The dust from the cars ahead of me decreased visibility substantially, giving me an idea of what it might be like to drive it with smoke in the air. A sobering thought.

We eventually reached Nevada City, where another new experience awaited as I joined a couple of friends (and fellow caravan participants) at the Communal Cafe — a lovely new coffee, breakfast, lunch place on Broad Street.

Next was a car wash (all that dust!), followed by visits to a couple of garden supply stores that were also new to me. I’d heard about Peaceful Valley Farm & Garden Supply, but had never checked it out. A beautiful space with lovely people. I bought gopher cages (which were on my list) and three plants (not on the list!).

My main shopping intention was to find two wine barrel planters; they didn’t have any at Peaceful Valley but someone suggested I look at Hills Flat Lumber.

This is a store up on a hill that I’ve seen a gazillion times while driving up and down Hwy 49, but I thought it was only lumber! I was totally surprised to discover household goods, a garden supply, and a well-stocked nursery (and I didn’t even explore three quarters of the store).

Plus they had wine barrel planters — yay!

I really enjoyed a full day of new and different things. I realize I need to do it more often.

End of a strange week

I’m rather glad to see this week come to an end.

I’ve felt by turns strange, challenged, frustrated, confused, irritated, stuck, angry, you name it.

Of course, there were pleasant, joyful moments in the mix as well; it’s just that they seemed rather outnumbered.

Oh well, all things — good and less-than-good — come to an end. For which I’m feeling quite grateful at the moment.

A throwback (on Thursday even)

I’m not much into the “Throwback Thursday” thing. Actually, now that I think about it, it might not even be a “thing” any longer!

Regardless, I was reading an article about something…which led me to check out something else…and I eventually stumbled into a lovely “throwback” moment. Namely, a reintroduction to the music of Kenny Rankin!

I loved, loved, LOVED the song “Haven’t We Met” in my late teens. And now I know that I love the bouncy waltz rhythm, the jazzy agility of his voice, and the quirky lighthearted lyrics just as much today as I did fifty years ago. (I’ve got to hand it to teenaged me: she had good musical taste!)

My only regret is that because I wasn’t into buying albums, my awareness of Kenny Rankin was limited to the songs that got played on the radio. Now I discovering the full extent of his talent.

HAVEN’T WE MET LYRICS
I’ve ordered some rain for tomorrow
The sky will be sunny but wet
And out of nowhere you’re suddenly there
And I say, “Yeah, pardon me, haven’t we met?”


I’ve ordered some sunshine with showers
And I’ve got my scenery set
Right there with a thump our umbrellas gonna bump
And I say, “Yeah, yeah, pardon me, haven’t we met?”

Accidents can happen
And into one I’m gonna slide
There’s a good chance to get my hands
On a little romance when two hearts collide


And I know that’s just how it happened
When Romeo met Juliet
Somewhere I’ve read that old Romeo said
“Pardon me, haven’t we met?”

And I know that’s just how it happened
When Romeo met Juliet
Somewhere I’ve read that old Romeo said
“Pardon me”, oh, he said, “Pardon me”
He said, “Pardon me, haven’t we met?”

A necessary reminder

Dealing with subtle feelings of irritation tonight and not liking the way it’s pulling down my energy.

Time to focus on gratitude instead, which isn’t hard because I’ve got lots and lots to be grateful for!

Which reminds me… I think I’m ready to follow-up on my gratitude tattoo.

Expanding my knowledge base

An amazing assortment of rocks and mulches

Today I ventured into a new world. It’s called Rare Earth Landscape Materials and as I walked around I definitely felt like a foreigner exploring interesting new lands.

My reason for going is that I want to upgrade my garden plots with some sort of ground covering. Since wood chips are verboten (due to flammability issues), my landscaper friend suggested I check out the possibility of using rocks or gravel.

The sheer number of options was the first surprise. The price per yard was the second (this stuff is not cheap).

A very nice woman employee gave me a kind but rather remedial lesson on how to calculate the number of square yards (or, more likely, square feet — my yard is small) of gravel I will need, since math has never been my strong suit.

She also explained just how heavy it is, requiring a seriously big truck to transport it. Definitely not my Hyundai Elantra!

Altogether very interesting and quite fun.

I had beautiful “exploring” weather

Lots and lots of rocks, soil, and gravel

The likely winner