(not necessarily in that order)
It seems like the big block I’ve been experiencing had to do with some deep but subtle inner processing. Which — thankfully — has now resolved itself into clarity around a big decision.
(I’m pretty sure it’s no coincidence that Mercury is going direct in another day or two.)
I’ll share more about all that soon.
In the meantime, much of my afternoon and evening was spent in the garden.
Hence the roses.
For the past few days I’ve been majorly struggling to complete certain tasks.
They aren’t difficult tasks but they are fairly urgent. They’re already overdue and need to get done.
And yet I am encountering the most ferocious resistance to doing them!
Actually, “resistance” isn’t the best word to describe what I’m feeling. It would be more accurate to say that I’m experiencing a refusal to obey.
No matter how much I reason with myself or try to motivate myself or cajole myself or threaten myself, a part of me just says NO. And right now, that part of me winning.
So, I entertained myself by finding other words that describe this unfortunate state of affairs:
Recalcitrance
Balkiness
Refractoriness
Insubordination
Disobedience
Maybe identifying it will sufficiently dissipate the blocking energy so I can actually get some work done. That’s my hope anyway.
Ramesha posted this quote yesterday; below is what he wrote to go with it. It’s so powerfully perfect for me right now that I had to share it here.
Sometimes, in the midst of everything that’s happening, it’s easy to forget this fundamental truth.
Doctors and medicines, obviously, have an important place in what’s happening.
But we ARE a soul and we HAVE a body, not the other way around.
Forgetting God equals neglecting our true nature.
No true health and well being can ever come from that.
We live in this body only temporarily, but we are a soul for eternity.
I’m so grateful for the reminder that, while the body is temporary, I am a soul for eternity.
What a blessing it is to have such a wise husband!
There was such a flurry of activity happening right around Swami Kriyananda’s birthday this year that I didn’t think about the fact that it was the third anniversary of this daily blog.
I started writing it on May 19, 2019 and — amazingly enough — I’m pretty sure I’ve managed to write something every single day since then.
Sometimes I think about switching to once a week or making some other alteration in the routine, but at this point it feels good to take a moment each day to reflect on something — anything — and then write about it.
What a great example of a picture being worth a thousand words!
I’ve experienced the truth of this many times in my life but have never understood it so clearly before.
What a full and complicated week it’s been…and there’s still Friday to go!
I’m amazed at just how many different ideas and bits of information and decisions to be made are swirling around in my brain.
It’s rather exhausting, so I think I’ll stop right there for tonight.
This quote really spoke to me today.
How much happier and kinder the world would be if everyone was encouraged to find and sing their song. No one else’s.
I’m feeling warm and fuzzy after receiving this latest outpouring of loving support.
And the timing was perfect, as we make peace with the longer rhythms required by this cancer journey.
I’m so grateful for dear friends who act as channels for Divine Mother’s love. 🙏
There’s a group on Facebook for people who lived (or still live, I guess) in Sunnyhills, the neighborhood of Milpitas where I grew up.
From the age of five until I moved out at eighteen, this view of the hills was what I saw pretty much every single day.
Our living room and kitchen windows faced east, so we looked up at the hills constantly. I remember my mother reciting one of her favorite scriptures: “I will look up to the hills from whence cometh my help.”
I haven’t lived in Milpitas since high school (except for a very brief period in my mid-twenties), but seeing this photo today brought back an intense wave of love for those hills.
It really feels like they’re a part of my DNA.
Our usual weed whackers have been booked up, so the meadow in our front yard has had plenty of opportunity to grow — especially after the spring rains of a few weeks ago.
I’m actually kind of enjoying it. It’s been fascinating watching the various grasses grow — some of them almost as tall as I am! — and seeing how they change over time.
I also think about how it’s providing a complete ecosystem for all sorts of little critters. Actually, I have some mixed feelings about that, given how many of those critters seem to find their way into our apartment!
