The role of the flute in my spiritual journey

Last summer I wrote a blog post about the very first duo concert Ramesha and I did, before we were even a couple! It was titled, “How it all began…

When I listen to the recording of that concert now, what amazes me the most is my flute-playing. It was a unique time really, when I was able to draw on my decades of experience as a professional flutist, but I no longer had to deal with being a professional flutist.

In other words, I no longer had the stress of driving all over the metropolitan SF Bay Area for gigs. I wasn’t spending hours practicing difficult music, followed by more hours sitting in orchestra with a mixed bag of musician colleagues playing that difficult music.

Instead, I was living in beautiful Umbria, surrounded by a level of calm and quiet that I’d never before experienced in my life. I didn’t have to drive at all. And virtually all of my time on the flute was spent playing beautiful uplifting melodies which — by professional flutist standards — were a piece of cake!

Don’t get me wrong; I loved being a professional musician and being part of an orchestra. I had a ton of awesome experiences and worked with lots of lovely people. But somewhere along the way it went from being something I did because I loved it, to turning into a job where I felt I never quite measured up. I pushed myself, then pushed myself some more, and eventually that sense of strain and stress started to come through in my flute tone.

Finally, I was ready to give up on being a flutist altogether, to the point where I tried (unsuccessfully, thank goodness) to sell my instrument. But within a couple of more years I had found my way to Ananda, Yogananda, and Swami Kriyananda; to meditation, Kriya Yoga, and spiritual community; to Ananda’s music, singing(!), and touring Italy for almost two years sharing that music.

And what I found in my first months living in Italy was that the dramatic shift in lifestyle resulted in a relaxation and renewed enjoyment that could be heard in my flute playing; it was like returning to the simple joy in making music that I had experienced from childhood up until about halfway through Conservatory.

Ramesha and I did include a few classical pieces on that India Benefit concert, but it’s far from a “perfect” performance. For one thing we talked and laughed through most of our rehearsal time, instead of working on the music. But really, we were there to have fun getting to know one another, while also sharing our joy in making music with our spiritual community.

We didn’t know it then, but it was the beginning of our musical dharma, the best gig of all.

Largo from Sonata in B minor by Georg Philipp Telemann | India Benefit Concert CD by Bhagavati & Ramesha

United in God, music, and laughter

We met through our spiritual community, so a love for God was what we shared before we even became acquainted.

We laughed a lot as our friendship grew. In fact, the first gift I ever gave him was a favorite photo of Swami Kriyananda laughing uproariously.

But I’m pretty sure love started to grow the first time we rehearsed together for a concert. It was like recognizing a kindred spirit (and, yes, we recently finished watching Anne of Green Gables!). 😄

The pictures above are from the weekend of our wedding at Ananda Assisi (we had two ceremonies, in order to accommodate family on both continents).

Back to our beginnings

The Harmony Duo performing in Lugano, Switzerland (2007)

While some things will never be quite the same as they were back in 2004 — when we first realized that we had a musical dharma to fulfill as a couple — the essence of who we are and the musical attunement we share remains constant.

These past many years we’ve kept ourselves extremely busy either singing with small groups or organizing Village and worldwide music or building a solo music business like Ramesha’s. Then the pandemic arrived and we suddenly couldn’t do a lot of the music we were accustomed to doing.

And bit by bit I started to understand how much I’ve missed making music with my other half. Turns out he’s missed it, too! So we’re getting ready to do something about that. 😊

Capturing the essence of a year

So, this is what I’ve been doing these past days. I can’t seem to wrap my mind around sharing anything else.

The process of reviewing the year was exhausting in some ways, because it meant remembering and sort of reexperiencing all the ups and downs and crazy changes of the past ten months. But it was also heartening, in the sense that we can look back and know that we got through it!

Hopefully, we’ll all be back to some semblance of normal soon.

Click here to read about our year: Ananda Music Annual Report

Day off? Ha!

Monday used to be our “day off,” but such distinctions have pretty much gone by the wayside in these topsy-turvy days.

Yes, I got a lot done, but it’s been the kind of intense day that has left me feeling like “toast” and more than ready to turn off the computer and be done with it.

Nowhere in particular

Today we went for a drive. A rather short drive to nowhere in particular.

But we went far enough in an unknown direction that we saw new scenery (not all that different, but still…).

We actually felt like we had gotten out and experienced something new together. Exciting!

Needing to remember this today

Wow, I really needed to hear this today!

Remember how far you’ve come,
not just how far you have to go.

As long as we simply keep going and don’t give up, it really is all good.

Yet another blast from the past

This is the fun side of Facebook: when I reconnect with schoolmates I had lost touch with for decades and then they share photos like this: Randy Knight, Ralph Kidwell, yours truly, and Adell Park, posing for a yearbook photo.

I’m pretty sure every single girl at Thomas Russell Junior High School owned a pair of Mary Jane shoes; however, I’m surprised that Adell got away with wearing a skirt that many inches above her knees!

Yes, those were the days when teachers would use a ruler to measure how short your skirt was. And, yes, those were the days when the girls demonstrated to be able to wear pants to school during wintertime.

It truly was different world.

Remnants of an era in time

I wanted to wear my pearls on inauguration day (in honor of our new Vice President), but I couldn’t find them. This was a bummer on several levels, especially because they had belonged to Ramesha’s mother. I couldn’t find them in the first few places I looked, but I knew I wouldn’t have gotten rid of them, so a major search ensued.

It took several days but I did eventually find the pearls (phew!). However, it got me started on going through my “stash” of precious items and mementos, with an eye toward giving away or otherwise letting go of extraneous “stuff” that we really don’t have space for in our little apartment.

And that’s how I happened upon the items in the photo above, which are remnants from a period of time (my early teens) when I got really into doing creative, crafty things. I no longer recall where the idea came from, but the basics involved some combination of alphabet pasta, glue, toothpicks, and paint.

Sometimes I painted rocks. The “Brooks” sun with the big smile was painted on leather to create a medallion. But what I painted on the most was wood doweling, which I cut on the diagonal, then stained and varnished.

The pasta letters were used to create names. I’m pretty sure the one in the photo started out as “Sharon,” but when I was fifteen I decided it would be extremely cool to change the spelling of my name. Hence, “Cheryn” (if you can believe it).🤦‍♀️ Look closely and you’ll see that the color of the C, E, and Y is slightly different than the H, R, and N.

I finished these off with a fastener to create pins. A number of my friends requested them and before I knew it, I had a little business going. The only problem is that it turned something I loved doing for fun into a chore, as I felt pressured to keep up with the demand.

But then I lost the little notebook where I had written down all the orders (the person’s name, what colors they wanted, etc.) and that was the end of that. Of course, I didn’t lose the notebook on purpose, but I do think my subconscious (or unconscious or whatever) was looking out for me.

And that’s the story of my very first “business” endeavor!

Kind of like (really) old times

Because I’ve been in a bit of a funk lately, I struggled more than usual to prepare for our department’s annual presentation. It got so bad that I actually reverted to behavior from my college days of several decades ago.

In other words, I waited until the very last minute, then — once the pressure had built to unbearable levels — I frantically pulled out all the stops, accomplishing in about 24 hours that which would have been better (and certainly more calmly) done in three to five days.

The only element lacking was a trip to the university library to check out a huge stack of books!