(not necessarily in that order)
After a turbulent, convoluted, multi-week process, it’s a relief to have actually arrived at a decision.
True, it’s not what I want to do, but I can feel that it’s the right thing to do. Which means I can once again get all my energy moving forward in one focused direction.
That’s my hope, at any rate.
For the past month or so we’ve been trying to plan what started out as a fairly straightforward trip.
I don’t know whether it’s something astrological or what, but lately each passing week has brought a new wrinkle or some other complication.
The dates keep changing. The form keeps changing. The advice keeps changing.
If it gets much more confusing, we might just have to stay home.
Tonight was our final choir rehearsal for this Saturday’s event celebrating Nayaswami Jyotish’s 80th birthday.
Two of the musical offerings we’ve prepared for Jyotish felt rather daunting to pull together in the limited time we had available after the conclusion of Spiritual Renewal Week. But tonight it was clear that both projects were absolutely the right thing to do, and they’re coming together beautifully.
In fact, thinking over the entire rehearsal, I’m feeling a whole lot of gratitude for the harmonious, team-oriented, collaborative way that our music ministry and the entire choir works together.
Sure, there are chaotic moments, but the overall feeling is one of uplifted and uplifting FUN.
What a joy it is to serve in this way.
Today — July 31, 2023 — would have been my mother’s 89th birthday.
As I thought about her, I started remembering how much she loved her flowers — especially rhododendrons, gladiolus, and bottlebrush.
Happy heavenly birthday, Mom!
Indeed, there’s been a lot to think about lately.
I knew exactly what I wanted to share this evening and had it all pretty much done…but then it basically self-destructed (in other words, all the photos decided to disappear).
So, I’m taking it as a sign that I’m supposed to go to bed and try again tomorrow.
My friend, Graziella, posted this photo on Facebook today and seeing it brought back beautiful memories of being at a luncheon there in honor of Swami Kriyananda.
The room is the Cenacolo Fiorentino (which translates as the “Florentine Supper Room”) on the upper floor of the Ristorante Grand Café Al Porto, located in the historic center of Lugano.
If I remember correctly, it was May (I’m not sure what year) and Swami Kriyananda was relaxing for a few days in Lugano. In honor of his upcoming birthday, the leader of the Lugano meditation group organized a boat tour of Lake Lugano followed by lunch at Al Porto — one of Swamiji’s favorite restaurants in Lugano.
It was a beautiful day, now a treasured memory.
Maybe writing yesterday’s blog post was therapeutic. Or maybe I just got fed up with constantly feeling behind.
Whatever the reason, the good news is that I spent a few satisfying hours this afternoon feeling focused and actually accomplishing a number of tasks.
Yay!
I’m slowly coming to realize that I actually haven’t been settling back into my routines very well. In fact, I can’t quite remember what my routines are.
I still get work done, but it feels rather haphazard and is often driven by the pressure of deadlines and urgency. Not ideal.
I started wondering what’s wrong with me that I’m not “knuckling down” and “getting it done.”
But then I thought, “Oh, right. The pandemic.” And, “Oh, right. Cancer.” Both, in their own way, dismantled any sense of normalcy.
The pandemic did it by completely obliterating routine, while cancer simply imposed its own demanding routine and schedule for pretty much a full year.
This realization doesn’t magically make everything fall into place, but at least I can acknowledge why it’s feeling like such an uphill battle to get focused and productive.
And though “scattered and unfocused” may be my current normal, I have faith it’s only temporary.
Can’t remember the last time I sat up late handwriting music parts; it’s surely been decades and decades.
Fun to watch little details come back to me…and I’m grateful for it, too.