Remnants of an era in time

I wanted to wear my pearls on inauguration day (in honor of our new Vice President), but I couldn’t find them. This was a bummer on several levels, especially because they had belonged to Ramesha’s mother. I couldn’t find them in the first few places I looked, but I knew I wouldn’t have gotten rid of them, so a major search ensued.

It took several days but I did eventually find the pearls (phew!). However, it got me started on going through my “stash” of precious items and mementos, with an eye toward giving away or otherwise letting go of extraneous “stuff” that we really don’t have space for in our little apartment.

And that’s how I happened upon the items in the photo above, which are remnants from a period of time (my early teens) when I got really into doing creative, crafty things. I no longer recall where the idea came from, but the basics involved some combination of alphabet pasta, glue, toothpicks, and paint.

Sometimes I painted rocks. The “Brooks” sun with the big smile was painted on leather to create a medallion. But what I painted on the most was wood doweling, which I cut on the diagonal, then stained and varnished.

The pasta letters were used to create names. I’m pretty sure the one in the photo started out as “Sharon,” but when I was fifteen I decided it would be extremely cool to change the spelling of my name. Hence, “Cheryn” (if you can believe it).🤦‍♀️ Look closely and you’ll see that the color of the C, E, and Y is slightly different than the H, R, and N.

I finished these off with a fastener to create pins. A number of my friends requested them and before I knew it, I had a little business going. The only problem is that it turned something I loved doing for fun into a chore, as I felt pressured to keep up with the demand.

But then I lost the little notebook where I had written down all the orders (the person’s name, what colors they wanted, etc.) and that was the end of that. Of course, I didn’t lose the notebook on purpose, but I do think my subconscious (or unconscious or whatever) was looking out for me.

And that’s the story of my very first “business” endeavor!

Happy Inauguration Day!

I wasn’t really expecting to be swept up in such intense waves of feeling today. I think a part of me has been holding back, maintaining some distance — perhaps in order to keep me safe from last minute disappointments?

So it wasn’t until last night that it all kicked in for me. Hearing about the “Wear Pearls on Jan 20th, 2021” Facebook group — over 470,000 women united in their commitment to wear pearls in honor of Kamala — lit a fire under me.

I tuned into the ceremony partway through Biden’s speech and was so grateful for his calm, gracious, humble demeanor. Of course, I know he’s not perfect, but it feels to me like his sincerity is real and his character is true.

I have no words to describe how blown away I was by Amanda Gorman. Just… WOW!

But maybe what surprised me the most was the intensity of my relief. It’s as if I hadn’t been able to fully acknowledge — even to myself — just how anxious and uncomfortable and even, as a person of color, fearful I had been for much too long (not for myself so much, but for my family and POC in general). It takes a lot of energy to keep from knowing what one knows, and now that energy is freed up and available to use in constructive ways.

As I sobbed uncontrollably at the end of the ceremony I felt a bone deep, visceral sense of release. And, yes, I felt like I could breathe again; that I could recognize my country again; that the true power of love and light and truth had prevailed yet again.

Out of all the eloquent words people shared today, I especially loved the following (written by a friend; thanks, Paul Green):

“Today I’m reminded that miracles are miracles. Just one miraculous day carries enough power to transcend four years of darkness. Just one lightbulb chases out a whole room of darkness. Just one young poet reminds us of the positive power of the word, after years of debasement of language. Love can win, no matter how long it’s been beaten down. There are no small miracles.”