Our friend and gurubai, Mary Kretzmann, left her body this afternoon.
Similar to when Krishna passed away, it’s only been in the last few weeks that we understood just how ill Mary was. After being in a care facility and the hospital, she returned to the Village today…only to make her transition shortly after arriving at her home.
There will be many words written about Mary — she led the Ananda Prayer Ministry for many, many years; she was a wonderful mother and grandmother; she had a beautiful voice and a great sense of humor — but for now, all I can say is, “Go with love, dear friend.” 🙏
Once again the impetus came from discovering that a key music ministry friend had never seen it, but we’re always happy to find an excuse to view this movie regardless.
I certainly won’t wait another four years to see it again.
I spent a fair amount of time this morning talking on the phone with a friend who’s dealing with a serious cancer diagnosis and difficult treatment scenario. She’ll probably be facing a stem cell transplant in a few weeks and wanted to talk with me about my experience.
I was happy to answer questions, listen to her concerns, and just generally offer support. What I didn’t anticipate was how our conversation would make me realize how distanced I felt from an experience that was unbelievably intense at the time.
It brought to mind something I read just the other day (can’t remember where, unfortunately), about how — while our human brains will remember that something was painful — we can’t actually feel that pain again (which must be why women are able to give birth multiple times).
Of course, it all started coming back to me as I dredged up my memories. And I suddenly realized that this time last year I was in full-on transplant preparation mode.
To bring it into clearer focus, I went back to my July 2022 calendar and discovered that from July 11-29 I had twenty different medical appointments — from lab draws and chemo infusions; to oncologist, cardiology, pulmonary, and physical therapy appointments; culminating in my second bone marrow biopsy.
And now? It’s hard to believe all that really happened.
I was catching up with a friend I hadn’t seen in some time, comparing notes on life and its lessons.
We got pretty philosophical, agreeing on the importance of not being overly focused on oneself. But then she shared something that I found extremely helpful.
Basically, she related how she had made the decision that: “If I’m going to think about myself, let it be something good.”
When she said that I immediately found myself reflecting on how the tendency is to spend tons of time focused on me, but almost all of it is negative self talk. It’s the worst of both worlds!
So, I’m going to adopt this as my own and practice telling myself good things about me.
I love when Divine Mother puts me in just the right spot at just the right time, allowing me to know beyond all doubt that God is in charge.
Today it happened as I had finished running a few errands in the mailroom and was walking back to my car.
I heard my name and turned around to see a dear friend from Los Angeles getting out of her car to greet me. I knew she was coming for a visit but thought I might not see her because we’re going out of town tomorrow.
But there she was and we were able to have a short but deep time of connection.
And then it got even better!
We were literally the only two people at the (closed) Market, where she had stopped in hopes of getting directions to the home of the friend at whose home she was staying. So I was able to have her follow me to the location (which would have been way confusing to try and describe in words).
So, yeah. It’s wonderful to be reminded that all really is in perfect divine order. We just have to do our best to stay tuned in to that flow and let it guide us.
Saying good-bye tonight to someone who I knew only for a short while “in person,” but we stayed connected on Facebook through multiple moves and numerous life challenges for the ten years or so that followed.
I followed her seemingly victorious battle with cancer and knew when it had come back. Just a few weeks ago she shared that she had made the decision to chose hospice over hospital-based care. She was at peace with making her transition.
Lizzie continued sharing her love and light until the very last, dying peacefully in the middle of sharing a prayer on Facebook. I find this so deeply inspiring; I don’t think she would mind me sharing it.
Aspiration to The Holy Family Prayer: Jesus, Mary and Joseph: I give Thee my heart and my soul. Jesus, Mary, and Joseph: assist me in my last agony. Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, may I breath forth my soul in peace with Thee.
