Tag: compassion

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A discovery: random but inspiring

Love this photo that Declan shared with one of his posts. The writing on the side of the boat says: “The struggle you’re in today is developing the strength you need for tomorrow. DON’T GIVE UP!”

A post from the group Camino de Santiago All Routes randomly popped up on my Facebook feed today. I really enjoyed reading it and on an impulse clicked through to the author’s personal profile.

Declan McGuiness is from Carrickfergus in Northern Ireland. An accountant, he sounds like a completely average kind of guy, but I was deeply touched as I read one after another of his Facebook posts.

He writes about suicide prevention and mental health and caring for one another. I love his wisdom and compassion, plus I get a kick out of the Irishness of it all. I can practically hear his accent as I read his words.

Hey lads?
Imagine if you counted your achievements as often as you count your flaws???
Imagine if you counted your wins as often as you count your defeats?
Imagine if you counted your compliments as often as your insults?
Imagine if you counted your pluses as often as your minuses?
Imagine if you gave yourself a break?
Imagine?

You know the wee voice that tells you that you can’t do it?
You can’t climb that hill?
You can’t hike that distance?
You can’t cycle that far?
It does our head in, doesn’t it?
But.
Maybe we are hearing it wrong.
Maybe it’s not actually saying no all the time.
Maybe it’s actually saying be careful climbing that hill.
Maybe it’s actually saying take a break if you are going to hike that distance.
Maybe it’s a actually saying take provisions and spares if you are going to cycle that far.
Maybe it’s not trying to stop us.
Maybe it’s trying to protect us.
Just a thought.
Maybe go ahead and do the things.
But listen to the voice, and take care.
It’s OK not to feel OK.

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Practicing compassion

Before…
…and after

Our local deer are helping me to grow spiritually.

How? Well, this is the time of year when all the vegetation is so dried out that the deer begin eating plants they would usually avoid.

So, the “deer resistant” flowers that I was so excited to plant a few weeks ago? The photos tell the story.

Notice the lush growth in the bottom right of the before pic, and how it’s almost entirely gone in the after photo.

Before…
…and after

I actually caught a doe and her fawn red-handedly chomping on my butterfly bush one day! As a result I find myself more resentful than appreciative when I see deer around the community.

But then I remember that they’re desperate and I do my best to practice compassion.

Which is how the deer are helping me to grow spiritually!

Before…
…and after
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Things we take for granted

Whenever I have a day or two of feeling yucky, I’m soooo relieved to have my full energy back again.

It’s interesting that when I had my one-day intestinal thing on Monday, it occurred to both Ramesha and I that maybe I was getting a small taste — just a little hint — of how I might feel after the bone marrow transplant.

And in reflecting on it further, I’m beginning to understand that the reason I find it so shocking to not have energy is because I take having high energy for granted! I feel that it’s my due, because I’ve always had it.

Well, that’s been my good karma in this lifetime, but I realize that it has limited my ability to comprehend and have compassion for people with a different reality.

Which got me thinking about how we all have at least one “something” that comes easily and naturally to us (for me, it’s been good health and high energy, as well as liking people and having people like me; someone else might be naturally good with money or extremely disciplined, etc. — you get the idea).

But often we can tend to get impatient with someone who struggles with the thing that comes so naturally to us. We don’t understand why they “don’t just…” (snap out of it; get more organized; just do it; etc.).

And maybe this is why sometimes we get a little wake up call, a period of time (hopefully short) when we’re without the thing (that natural gift or ability) that we usually take for granted. Because then we’re experiencing it from the other side and maybe — just maybe — expanding our awareness and learning compassion.

Something to think about.

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Silenced once again

Yep, in some ways we’re back to the beginning — no live singing or chanting, for Sunday service or anywhere else at Ananda Village, until January 5 at the earliest.

But in other ways, it’s not like the beginning at all. It’s way more frustrating because of all the time and energy and resources expended in between, for seemingly nothing.

Not to mention the sacrifices!

And yes, a part of me thinks I have some nerve whining about not being able to sing. I mean, I think about all those working on the front lines in hospitals and clinics — from doctors and nurses to food service workers and cleaning crews. I think about the people working in grocery stores and gas stations and pharmacies, so that we can be fed and supplied. And I am so, so grateful for them all.

So, yeah, in some ways we’re back to the beginning, but with a lot more understanding and compassion and — yes — patience.

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We can do better than this

Lately I’ve been reflecting on the word “other” as a verb: “to view or treat (a person or group of people) as intrinsically different from and alien to oneself.”

It seems to me that “othering” is a behavior that is on the increase among people who I think really ought to know better; namely, friends and colleagues that I know and love. These are people with intelligent minds and big hearts, who are falling into the trap of turning those they disagree with into the “other.”

Of course, once we’ve turned someone into the “other,” we feel justified in talking to and about them in a way that mutes our empathy, dims our compassion, and diminishes our humanity.

This is not the way forward!

I found the following in a blog post as I was reading up about this. As a self-described “liberal,” I found it rather sobering:

“Interestingly enough, some argue that liberals’ use of “other” as a verb actually contributes to political othering by alienating conservatives. In a recent piece for Commentary magazine titled “The Resistance’s Hat Trick — ‘Othering’ for beginners,” Christine Rosen wrote, “‘Othering’ is a term favored by the left … Trump uses dehumanizing rhetoric to discuss immigrants; the left parries with ‘othering’ rhetoric about MAGA-hat wearing Trump voters. And round and round the cycle goes. It’s great for clickbait and Twitter wars, but terrible for healthy debate.“
From New Verb Provides an ‘Other’ Perspective by Rob Kyff

We can do better than this; we need to do better than this; we must do better than this!

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Let’s not gloat or despair

One can rejoice without gloating. And one can grieve without despairing. Don’t gloat and don’t despair; those behaviors will simply impede the healing this country so desperately needs.

It’s time for extra doses of kindness, empathy, compassion. And, of course, LOVE.

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Forgiveness

I was on the road this morning, on my way to meet my father and sister for breakfast, when a random thought entered my mind, then took root and became something more…

I have no idea how or why, but I found myself thinking about some of the horrible things people do to other people and wondering if I ever found myself in such a situation whether I would have enough faith and inner strength to react with compassion and forgiveness rather than fear and anger.

“Father, forgive them for they know not what they do,” popped into my mind.

That, of course, brought the high example of Jesus to mind. And it occurred to me that the truth of the matter is, when someone is hurting another person, there’s always ignorance of what they’re doing.

Most of us are only focused on the here and now, so we think we know what we’re doing. But there are infinite subtle realities beyond the one we can see, and our ignorance of those subtle realities is exactly why we “know not” what we do; to ourselves and to the one “whole” of which we are a part.

I found myself thinking: “Father, forgive them for they knew not what they did”, extending this thought retroactively to anyone and everyone who I felt had ever hurt me.

And then it became: “Father, forgive me for I knew not what I did.”

Wow. Apply compassion and forgiveness to myself? What a concept. But the truth is, as one of my favorite Asha quotes says: “If I could of done better, I would of done better.” Time to let myself off the hook for not being perfect already , eh?

So, what about you?

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My best self

“My best self”. This phrase popped into my head as I was praying before meditation this morning. I’m not even entirely sure what the heck I was thinking of exactly.

What surprised me is that thoughts of “my best self” were all externally oriented. In other words, what came to mind were things that were measurable and visible: things that could be (and have been!) judged.

Then something radical occurred to me… what if I’ve had it backwards all these years? What if aiming to be “my best self” is all (and only) about how I feel inside? What if being “my best self” is a matter of self-acceptance, of self-forgiveness, of compassion for myself? What if it’s opening up to wholly receive God’s love and then learning to love myself as God loves me: unconditionally?

I mean, it makes sense that the more I’m in tune with and expressing the Divine, the more I’ll be my “best Self”. What do you think?