Today I’m feeling so grateful for the awareness that I am rich in every way that counts.
Thank you, God!
Feeling rich
Learning to love my nervous system
My first hint regarding the issue of dysregulation and the importance of a regulated nervous system came in 2022 when I was working with Dr. Suhaila, my naturopathic oncologist.
I was surprised by her extremely strong reaction when I shared a story of a childhood trauma (it was nothing earth-shattering and no one intentionally harmed me; it was simply an accidental experience that left me scared and shocked).
It had never occurred to me that my eight-year-old self wasn’t perfectly okay immediately afterwards or that there was something someone could have done to help me cope with the stress of the experience.
Now I feel like I’m passing through a portal into a whole new awareness of — and learning about — my nervous system.
Fascinating!
Second Summer
I was reading about a heat wave coming to the Bay Area and it occurred to me that when I was growing up we almost always encountered some unusual heat in October or November. But we used to call it Indian Summer.
Having caught myself just the other day starting to call a meeting a “powwow,” I found myself reflecting on why it’s called Indian Summer…and whether it’s still called that.
So, I did a little research and found an article that explained why it’s now more correctly referred to as Second Summer.
I find it interesting that I’m having to increase my awareness of terms that are considered disrespectful or even offensive to Indigenous people.
Why? Because despite being one-quarter Native American (one-eighth from both parents), I didn’t grow up feeling Native American. Plus I grew up at a time when cultural sensitivity and awareness were pretty much non-existent.
As children we played cowboys and Indians; we threw up a hand and said “How”; we called one another “Indian giver.” And as young adults we were still saying things like “too many chiefs and not enough Indians”; talking about “circling the wagons” or “holding down the fort”; and describing someone as being “low man on the totem pole.”
It’s sobering to realize how deeply I’ve internalized phrases and comments that seem innocuous but definitely have less than positive connotations.
My friend wrote a book!
How cool is this?!?
Congratulations to Manisha, who’s been a dear friend ever since we both were newly arrived in the Ananda Palo Alto community back in the late 90’s.
I can’t wait to read it (there are two copies because one’s for Dad).
S-t-r-e-t-c-h
I immediately resonated with this quote, but then found myself having to step back and really think about it, seeking to understand exactly why I felt it to be true.
It’s not easy to put into words, but I think it has something to do with bringing awareness to the sound or the movement, of being present with your mind or your life. And the more fully aware or present one is, the more mastery one can achieve in music, dance, or meditation…I’m still a little hazy on the celebration aspect (which makes me think maybe I need to be more present with my life).
But as much as it resonated, I didn’t see this as a topic for my blog; sharing it on Facebook seemed enough. But then my friend Sharmila, from India, wrote a comment that took it to a whole other level for me: “Heart when stretched is love.”
In her comment, Sharmila followed the word stretched with the word opened, which, for me at least, led quite naturally to the concept of expanded. And certainly, an ever-more open and expanded sound has been a fundamental part of what I’ve always sought to achieve as a musician.
So…now I’m more clearly seeing stretching as becoming more–by making maximum use of our talents and abilities; by extending and expanding through time and space (way beyond our comfort zones); and by opening ever more fully to all the infinite possibilities of life.