Month: January 2021

Posted on

Loving my country

I’m still processing the intense feelings from yesterday’s inauguration. Several times during the day I found myself spontaneously thinking of lines from patriotic songs, like:
This is my country! Land of my birth!
or:
God bless America, land that I love…

And it got me to thinking about being a “patriot” — a concept that has been whittled down to such a narrow and limited definition that I’m almost afraid to identify as a patriot. (Which is especially galling because at Milpitas High School we were the Patriots; the image above is our mascot).

But, gosh darn it, I am patriotic. I do love my country. No, I don’t automatically believe America is always the best in every way, but I love it no matter what. And what I’ve learned in recent days is that I don’t really have a choice.

It’s like comparing mothers. You can appreciate that other people’s mothers are wonderful, but no one can replace your own mother in your heart. You might get mad at her or disagree with her, but you don’t stop loving her.

Well, that’s how I felt on Wednesday. I’ve been having some issues with my country but gosh darn it, it is my country and I love it.

There’s one more patriotic song that came to my mind. This is from another album of my Dad’s that I loved to listen to as a child. The title is, “The House I Live In,” but I love how the song so eloquently and lovingly answers the question, “What is America to me?” I especially resonate with the ending phrase: “But especially the people, that’s America to me.” That’s my truth as well.

The House I Live In (1947)
What is America to me?
A name, a map or a flag I see,
A certain word, “Democracy”,
What is America to me?

The house I live in,
The friends that I have found,
The folks beyond the railroad
and the people all around,
The worker and the farmer,
the sailor on the sea,
The men who built this country,
that’s America to me.

The words of old Abe Lincoln,
of Jefferson and Paine,
of Washington and Jackson
and the tasks that still remain.
The little bridge at Concord, 
where Freedom’s Fight began,
of Gettysburg and Midway 
and the story of Bataan.

The house I live in,
my neighbors White and Black,
the people who just came here 
or from generations back,
the town hall and the soapbox,
the torch of Liberty,
a home for all God’s children,
that’s America to me.

The house I live in,
the goodness everywhere,
a land of wealth and beauty 
with enough for all to share.
A house that we call “Freedom”,
the home of Liberty,
but especially the people,
that’s America to me.

But especially the people–
that’s the true America…

Posted on

Happy Inauguration Day!

I wasn’t really expecting to be swept up in such intense waves of feeling today. I think a part of me has been holding back, maintaining some distance — perhaps in order to keep me safe from last minute disappointments?

So it wasn’t until last night that it all kicked in for me. Hearing about the “Wear Pearls on Jan 20th, 2021” Facebook group — over 470,000 women united in their commitment to wear pearls in honor of Kamala — lit a fire under me.

I tuned into the ceremony partway through Biden’s speech and was so grateful for his calm, gracious, humble demeanor. Of course, I know he’s not perfect, but it feels to me like his sincerity is real and his character is true.

I have no words to describe how blown away I was by Amanda Gorman. Just… WOW!

But maybe what surprised me the most was the intensity of my relief. It’s as if I hadn’t been able to fully acknowledge — even to myself — just how anxious and uncomfortable and even, as a person of color, fearful I had been for much too long (not for myself so much, but for my family and POC in general). It takes a lot of energy to keep from knowing what one knows, and now that energy is freed up and available to use in constructive ways.

As I sobbed uncontrollably at the end of the ceremony I felt a bone deep, visceral sense of release. And, yes, I felt like I could breathe again; that I could recognize my country again; that the true power of love and light and truth had prevailed yet again.

Out of all the eloquent words people shared today, I especially loved the following (written by a friend; thanks, Paul Green):

“Today I’m reminded that miracles are miracles. Just one miraculous day carries enough power to transcend four years of darkness. Just one lightbulb chases out a whole room of darkness. Just one young poet reminds us of the positive power of the word, after years of debasement of language. Love can win, no matter how long it’s been beaten down. There are no small miracles.”

Posted on

Meandering

I had three topic possibilities for today’s post but none of them would come into focus. Instead I spent hours in mental meandering, without ever finding my out of the the mental maze!

Oh well.

Posted on

A day to remember a King

Below are two quotes — one by and the other about Martin Luther King Jr. — that I had never heard before. I found both really powerful and hope you do, too.

“Love is the greatest force in the universe. It is the heartbeat of the moral cosmos. He who loves is a participant in the being of God.”

Martin Luther King Jr.

“The moment I met Martin Luther King, Jr., I knew I was in the presence of a holy person. Not just his good work, but his very being was a source of great inspiration for me…In Vietnam, we refer to Dr. King as a ‘Bodhisattva’, an enlightened being devoted to serving humanity.”

Thich Nhat Hanh
Posted on

A material plane kind of day

Today in my house we put away everything Christmas-related (yay, Ramesha!) and did a ton of laundry (yay, me!), as well as a number of other chores (like taking out the recycling and compost, and watering the plants).

Unfortunately, the older I get the less patience I have for material plane tasks. Which is too bad because I really, really like a clean, uncluttered, neat environment.

On days like today I fantasize about what it would be like to have a live-in housekeeper. 😂

Posted on

Overcoming resistance

Today was an overcoming resistance kind of day.

A day to support a friend, but within an uncomfortable context that was challenging for me.

And a day to knuckle down and do some important tasks that I’ve been majorly procrastinating about.

Grateful to have the day behind me and feeling good about what I accomplished! 💪

Posted on

Missing the music

I had a big “aha” moment the other day. Our work, our ministry, our very raison d’être is music — especially the music of Ananda. And in the normal way of things, we would be immersed in it all the time.

We would be singing or playing — solo, duo, choir, or instrumental — virtually every Sunday for service. We would be rehearsing choir every Tuesday. On the other days we would be reviewing music, working with small groups, planning programs, and otherwise discussing things musical in preparation for Sunday or Tuesday or an upcoming event like the Oratorio or Christmas concert or something similar.

But for almost a year now we haven’t had that! Sure, we’ve performed as a duo, even a few times as part of a quartet. And we’ve put together virtual choir pieces. But we’re engaged in only a fraction of the music that would be usual for us.

Making the situation worse is the fact that Ramesha and I aren’t in the habit of listening to music at home. Mainly because it’s hard for us to focus on anything else when music is playing. But also because, after hours spent singing and playing, or listening to others sing and play, we enjoy going home to silence.

So, the bottom line — my big “aha” — is that we’re actually music-deprived right now and need to make some serious adjustments in order to restore the necessary musical equilibrium to our lives.

Posted on

Choosing the sweetness

Today Ramesha did a livestream where he shared this Cosmic Chant (by Yogananda) and it got me thinking…

I was mainly pondering the fact that I have to consciously choose the sweetness of life, joy, health, and praise. Not just once, but moment by moment, day after day after day.

I also have to remind myself — again and again — that death, sorrow, sickness, and blame are the dream. And, yes, I’ve lost many loved ones to death; I’ve felt deep sorrow; I’ve experienced sickness; and I’ve both cast blame and deserved it myself. On the level of consciousness which I currently inhabit, these experiences are very real, indeed!

But that’s why I’m on the spiritual path, doing my best to live in the light, to raise my consciousness, and wake up to a higher reality. And I love this chant because when I sing it or hear it, that higher reality feels more and more real, which is especially comforting in challenging times like these.

I pray that we may all do our best to allow the Divine Song to flow through us a little more every day. 🙏

When Thy Song Flows Through Me
O life is sweet
And death a dream
O life is sweet
And death a dream
When Thy song flows through me, my Lord
When Thy song flows through me

Then joy is sweet
Sorrow a dream
Then joy is sweet
Sorrow a dream
When Thy song flows through me, my Lord
When Thy song flows through me

Then health is sweet
Sickness a dream
Then health is sweet
Sickness a dream
When Thy song flows through me, my Lord
When Thy song flows through me

Then praise is sweet
And blame a dream
Then praise is sweet
And blame a dream
When Thy song flows through me, my Lord
When Thy song flows through me

Posted on

Message received & agreed

It’s becoming increasingly clear to me that I’m being given a definite assignment for 2021!

I mean, how else to explain the fact that I’ve been getting some version of this message (see above) pretty much every day lately?!?

So…. YES! Here I am, Lord; ready to give my all, by placing it in the Master’s hands; inviting you to use my God-given skills in order to manifest through me.

And now that I’ve got the WHAT, it’s time to move forward with figuring out the HOW (I’d say “wish me luck” but I know all will be revealed in perfect divine timing). 😊

Posted on

Time for a break

I’ve been thinking about the idea of being in the world but not of it (yes, I know it’s from scripture, but I’m just paraphrasing). To me this speaks to the challenge of finding that fine balance between being engaged and responsible in the world, while at the same time being aware of — and trying to live more on — the higher levels of reality.

Of course, that’s hard work (especially these days)! So, it was perfect to find this video of Dave Brubeck’s “Take Five” — because it’s time for a break (“take five” — get it? 😉) and because this is such a surprising, yet totally entertaining, rendition of the piece.

Of course, then I had to go back to the source and listen to the original version of “Take Five.” Why? Because Paul Desmond continues to be my all-time favorite alto saxophonist hero. His playing was just so darned tasteful and melodic.

But also because I learned to love the Dave Brubeck quartet when my Dad played the album as I was growing up. Plus Miles Davis; all nine Beethoven symphonies; Mussorgsky’s Pictures at an Exhibition; Oscar Peterson; Schubert’s Rosamunde; Thelonious Monk; and so on and so forth. ..

Great memories…and we still love listening to music together (or would if we could get together; oh well). Thanks for the gift of music, Dad! 💗